The Hobbit (and other dramatic nonsense)


Ok, I admit it: I'm hiding in the movie theater's bathroom rather than sit through another 75 minutes of unbroken, dramatic Hobbit cinematography. Don't get me wrong. I love the book the Hobbit, but these movies are literally murdering me. Here's a summation of the agonizing 170 minutes:Bilbo looks at Gandolf, who looks at Dwalin, who gazes dramatically at the fire... 15 minute flashback to some random battle that happened 40 years ago... More dramatic staring. Gandolf says something profound like "You must either go through or give up your quest. There are no safe paths in this part of the world." Dramatic staring contest between all dwarves and hobbits and wizards.

Kill me, please.

When did authenticity get traded for cheap and syrupy emotionally charged sentimentality.

P.s. If I have to listen to any rendition of The Lord of the Rings musical theme again I think I might die.