Hope for the Worst of Sinners (Me)

“I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy.” (Exodus 33:19)

Moses needed hope that God really could have mercy on a stiff-necked people who had just committed idolatry and scorned the God who brought them out of Egypt.

To give Moses the hope and confidence he needed, God said, “I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious.” In other words, "My choices do not depend on the degree of evil or good in man but solely upon my sovereign will. Therefore no one can say he is too evil to be shown grace."

"The doctrine of unconditional election is the great doctrine of hope for the worst of sinners. It means that when it comes to being a candidate for grace, your background has nothing to do with God’s choice." - John Piper

September has been a month of pain. Maybe it's an issue of irrational expectations in view of my golden birthday (28 years old on September 28). Maybe it's just another example of 2013's persistent churning out of every vile thing in my heart. In God's infinite mercy, he has been revealing every grubby, slimy, ugly thing that slinks in the dark places of my heart.

Lately, this has surfaced long-latent struggles with anorexia / bulimia, in my stupid effort to exert control over a world far beyond my grasp. Every meal has been a battle against the "old self," that pathetically artificially animated zombie that gnaws at my self-control piteously. I'm so thankful for being a part of Steps at the Village--a constant reminder that "the heart of the problem is the problem of the heart," and that "I can't fix it. God can."

This is why I, of all people, melt with gratitude when the unbelievable mercy of Christ is in view. Thank God for friends--Megan, Natalie, Ashley, and Christan in particular--who always battle with me in my brokenness and relentlessly encourage my wavering spirit. Let's start this Monday with a profound message of hope:

“Come, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool” (Isaiah 1:18).