Oh. My. Goodness.That's how I feel every year when another tick marks my annual progression. It's not a bad feeling. After all, life is a gift. Not everyone gets the blessing of another year of life. Still, as 30 creeps closer, I start realizing just how immature I am for my age. It's not that I'm immature compared to other 28 year olds; rather that the picture of Jenny at 28 I had in my head doesn't look like the reality. I thought, for instance, that going 3-ish days without a shower would never happen after 21 (*cough* please don't judge! I was exhausted! *cough*). And I was pretty confidant that the craziness, the domestic disorder, and especially the "oh-my-goodness-Jude-just-peed-himself-and-I-forgot-the-diaper-bag" scenarios would just not show up on this side of 25.

Ha ha, yeah. I was wrong. But actually that's a good thing. Our bud Matt-C (yes, the 3d version) often talks about how there is no other person that we lie to and betray more frequently then ourself. We stupidly believe that in a month, five years, a couple of decades maybe we'll have arrived at our "perfected" self---that version of us that didn't need *quite* so much saving grace. Of course we'd never say that so explicitly, but God knows I've subconsciously believed it. In the words of Paul, "if righteousness were through the law, then Christ died for no purpose" (Galatians 2:21).

The "law" Paul refers to there was that given to Moses in Deuteronomy and Leviticus after God had freed his people from slavery in Egypt. God's law starts with the one, most important and most impossible to keep: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might"(Deuteronomy 6:5). Anyone who honestly looked at their last 12 hours, I'm sure, could find SEVERAL breaches of this guy.

So what Paul is really saying is 'if you could save your self by your own goodness or morality, Jesus would have had no reason to die as payment for your treason (since there wouldn't be a treason to begin with).'

So on this rainy Saturday that didn't go at all as planned, I praise my God that I'm not the only one unable to become perfect. I'm so thankful that God knew what a screw up I'd be and he said, "Yup! I'm going to save that one despite herself."

That, friends, is truly something to celebrate!

"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory.

Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you.

So I will bless you as long as I live; in your name I will lift up my hands. " - Psalm 63:1-4